I'm insecure but I can't help it...

I decided to give up my delusion for lent... Sometimes you have to change something to realize it should never be changed.

Maybe my life isn't fun or exciting.. I can deal with that. My fantasy world probably isn't healthy but I doesn't cause as much damage as my reality. So sue me?!? I've grown to think maybe I don't care about certain people as much as I think I do.. I just needed to stop talking to/about them. I needed me again. While some women would rather die than be alone. I'd rather be alone than die trying to "be happy". I'm not happy right now but the peace I have now is much better than the insanity I feel when trying to make someone other than me make me happy. I'm simple, I like writing, sleeping, eating and sex. There's really nothing else... BUT that makes me undesirable... I digress.. I'm NOT allowed to bad mouth myself LOL! One day my real life might be fun.. so fun that I won't blog. I don't know why I care so much about what they think (I mean men). Eventually they all fade away until I find the one.. Until then me & vibrator are bestest friends and all men (outside my imagination) just don't exist.