She Kept it Real

So this Random lady popped up and texted me out of the blue, but at least she didnt beat around the bush for too long. so here's the screenshot




The V.I.P people in ones life never have to ask to be V.I.P. They know off top that their in that thang...But hey I respect the fact she got straight to the point without holding a big stupid long generic text exchange. Still and all I cant help ya. The fact that you had to ask should have gave you your answer. People Im good with know they good. Heauxs I tell ya!

Don't be THAT girl

I always catch myself. I went "out" this Friday & I spent most of my time in the club by my damn self. I don't fit in everywhere. Don't even try really. From the minute I walked in I realized "I'm not one of them". I don't know who they are. I don't know what they do. I just know I'm not them. I don't dance unless I'm joking. I don't take myself seriously because it's a fucking club not a senate meeting. My black friend girls aren't a squad. I've never really belonged to a group of (black) girls. Unless 8th grade which to most sane people it doesn't.

My conclusion is I go for quality. I have really strong relationships with people who don't hang out together unless I make them and that's so cool. Sometimes I wish I could fit in but I didn't grow up like them. Oh well... I'm not trying to be "down". I'd much rather be strange little me who sits alone. I just can't pretend.

Give it up

I'm not Catholic but for Lent I'm giving something up. I'm giving up the delusional fantasy world I live in. It's going to be hard. I don't know how to live outside this world I've created for myself. It's safe. I've become a snail or something. I hide in my shell and refuse to live life. I used to drink too much but at least back then I lived. This stale pit of depression that I live in has made me a horrific person. I hate myself. I'm not living just existing. I'm hoping that this new job and the move get me out of this bullshit I currently live in. My slump is mostly my fault and I understand that perfectly.
I realized my problem and I'm giving it up.. On to reality.