I'm almost positive that I'm horrible at being in relationships... that's another story. The 1st man I ever loved was Sunshine. He's white.. I'm not. Before college black men didn't tickle my fancy. I've grown to realize it's just New Orleans.
I love Sunshine [still]. Here goes the story. We met when I was 18. His being white never bothered me but it bothered everyone else. I still don't care he's one of my best friends. I can talk to him about anything. He was the first guy I ever met who didn't drink or smoke weed. It was strange. The things that once controlled my life were no longer there because he was really a good kid. I was sober 98% of the time we were together. [I was a bad ass lil kid I started smoking weed when I was 12] He went to college far far away. We started to take different paths in life. Eventually he stopped believing in himself and let "life" ruin him. He's quit 3 different colleges and has no idea what he wants to do with his life. Somewhere in the back of my mind I always assumed we would be together again. Now he has a baby. I can't re-wanna be with him. I can't handle him having no direction, I can't handle the kid & he doesn't know who Frankie Beverly is... that's a BIG problem. There's probably more to the story... I just can't think of it right now...
The reason they call it your first love is because you have to love again :-(
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