I was sober.
Reality was in a full effect. Amy Winehouse- Will you still love me tomorrow was playing in my mind on repeat. I lived in a moment for probably the first time this year. I was more aware of what I was doing than I've ever been. I didn't feel dirty. I did this mature adult thing with a mature adult... or I think he is LOL! I didn't feel the urge to wash in him off. I actually wanted him to linger. His presence thrills me. Its rare for me to do things I don't regret spritually, emotionally, mentally or even physically. I sinned & I'm really cool with that. The calm I felt when I was alone [after the fact] was incredible. I've never done something I knew was wrong and felt calm after. I love him... I'm not gonna bullshit and say that I'm in love but I love what he represents to me. His gaze isn't harsh & his heart isn't evil.
I went to church after & I said "God look you already know so I ain't frontin". Reality was in a full effect. Amy Winehouse- Will you still love me tomorrow was playing in my mind on repeat. I lived in a moment for probably the first time this year. I was more aware of what I was doing than I've ever been. I didn't feel dirty. I did this mature adult thing with a mature adult... or I think he is LOL! I didn't feel the urge to wash in him off. I actually wanted him to linger. His presence thrills me. Its rare for me to do things I don't regret spritually, emotionally, mentally or even physically. I sinned & I'm really cool with that. The calm I felt when I was alone [after the fact] was incredible. I've never done something I knew was wrong and felt calm after. I love him... I'm not gonna bullshit and say that I'm in love but I love what he represents to me. His gaze isn't harsh & his heart isn't evil.
My conclusion: Sex isn't dirty if its with the right person at the right time & for the right reason (right reason being because you just broke up with #1 and #2 is in town)
*POW*I can't be serious for a whole blog it hurts me
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